How can I tell if my cat loves me?
In this blog we look at how you can tell if your cat loves you. As sentient beings both species need love and connection to thrive. Let’s look at how we can create a loving relationship with our cats.
What is love?
There have been sooooo many songs, poems, stories and films made about love. It can be a really simple concept, or a confusing experience. And everything in between!
If there is one thing I am certain of…I love my cats. And I’m sure you do too.
I can’t wait to spend time with them, I love to be around them. They bring me comfort when I am emotionally struggling. They make me smile, all the time.
I get up at 4:30am to let them out and stay up until 11pm trying to get them in (Baby Max I’m talking to you!)
I get them the best food I can afford, give them as much time and attention as I am able. I put their needs before my own. I would do anything in my power to make sure they are happy, healthy and well.
That’s how love feels to me for my cats. What about you?
Signs that your cat loves you.
Cats can be fairly consistent in showing love to humans. Sure, they each have slightly different meows, meeps or peeps. You know I believe that every cat is unique but there are some behavioural elements that cats display which can be interpreted as signs of love and affection.
Signs of cat love:
Eye kisses aka slow blinks
Leg strokes
Showing their tummy (touch at your own risk!)
Sitting on your lap (or half on your lap and half on the sofa as Pickle used to do!)
Purring
Playing
Head tilt
Head boops (nudging your hand with their head)
A cat may show all or some of these signs. It depends on how they feel safe, how they are comfortable interacting with you. A cat doesn’t need to show all of these for you to get the message that they love you.
When we first got Leo we had oodles of head tilts and slow blinks. Then we started to get head boops and leg strokes. Now we have purring and chest cuddles!
Humans thrive on connection, and it has been my experience that when people take guardianship of a cat they want some form of physical interaction. I’ve never met someone that said they got a cat to simply look at it!
But what we have to remember is that every cat will express themselves in a way they feel most comfortable doing. Just like us humans! Some humans like to hug when they greet or leave someone. Others really don’t like that. We respect other humans and how they show love and it’s high time we started doing it for cats too.
How do humans show love?
There are a multitude of ways that humans can show one another they love each other. Asking someone to text you when they get home, making food for a family member. Helping out financially or providing emotional support. The list is endless. I read a great book a few years ago about love languages by Gary Chapman. It was fascinating, and truly ignited the psychologist in me!
I would highly recommend you read the book. It talks about how humans show love that falls into the following 5 categories:
Physical touch
Words of affirmation
Acts of service
Gifts
Quality time
My two predominant love languages are quality time and acts of service. Now let’s face it, it’s going to be a little difficult for Leo to bring me a cup of coffee in the morning as an act of service! So I thoroughly enjoy our cuddles in the morning, or brushes on the bed. Its quality time for me.
It’s helpful to know what your love languages are so you can look at how your relationship with your cat fulfils your needs for love and connection.
Feel the love.
As I bring this blog to a close, take a minute. Feel into your love languages. Think about how your cat shows you affection and connection.
Cats are not aloof animals that can be left alone for long periods of time. They are sensitive, sentient beings that need love and connection just like humans.
If you need to know if your cat loves you, watch them. See how they show you, in cat speak, that they love and trust you.
Then take a look at yourself, identify what needs you have and see if your cat meets them.
If you are struggling to connect with your cat come and join me for my ‘How to become a soul led cat guardian programme – Heal your heart to help your cat.’
I hope you have enjoyed this blog.
Feel free to get in touch and tell me how you know your cat loves you.
Email me.